No More F*cked Up Teas, Please

How to Spot One and What to Do Instead

feel it feel it feel it, i wanna feel it. say it like you mean it. ooOoo OooO shout it out!

Humans have built a relationship with teas and tisanes (that's a fancy word for herbal tea,) for the better part of four millennia.

Whether it's peppermint for an upset stomach, or whatever the fuck is in sleepytime tea, most of us have a relationship with herbal tea.

You would think something so simple was hard to fuck up. Yet I've noticed a rather widespread problem with teas on the market. Here are the two biggest ones:

1. Many pre-bagged teas are full of microplastics, and they know they are.

2. A lot of the teas sold by herbal influencers are unbrewable. To make matters worse, the directions will not lead to medicinal infusions.

The grand opening of my store, balm in gilead herb shop, is THIS THURSDAY, May 8th! You can subscribe to our newsletter, instagram, or facebook for more info :).

These two major problems are why I decided to lead the workshop Simple Herbal Teas for Sleep as part of our grand opening! If you're in New York's so-called Hudson Valley, I hope you'll join us in person (the shop is in Kingston, NY btw)

For those of you who are farther out, here's my problem with plastic-filled teas that don't work.

Humans have built a relationship with teas and tisanes (that's a fancy word for herbal tea,) for the better part of four millennia.

Whether it's peppermint for an upset stomach, or whatever the fuck is in sleepytime tea, most of us have a relationship with herbal tea.

You would think something so simple was hard to fuck up. Yet I've noticed a rather widespread problem with teas on the market. Here are the two biggest ones:

1. Many pre-bagged teas are full of microplastics, and they know they are.

2. A lot of the teas sold by herbal influencers are unbrewable. To make matters worse, the directions will not lead to medicinal infusions.

The grand opening of my store, balm in gilead herb shop, is THIS THURSDAY, May 8th! You can subscribe to our newsletter, instagram, or facebook for more info :).

These two major problems are why I decided to lead the workshop Simple Herbal Teas for Sleep as part of our grand opening! If you're in New York's so-called Hudson Valley, I hope you'll join us in person (the shop is in Kingston, NY btw)

For those of you who are farther out, here's my problem with plastic-filled teas that don't work.

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Microplastics

Ok, like on one hand, yeah, sure our bodies are chock full of microplastics. Our brains have about a spoons-worth of plastic in them these days.

You may be thinking, Cyrée, what's a lil more? Well, a 2025 study showed that because of the mucus lining of our guts, they're actually the best at "taking up" microplastics into the body.

While some of this research is quite new, and I don't want to assume, the health risks of even more potent ingestion of plastic...probably isn't great.

Mind you, we've all smelled heated up plastic. So fine ground plastics in boiling water are not my idea of fun.

Many people look at herbal tea as a way to improve their wellness and health without pharmaceuticals. (I'm very pro-pharmaceuticals btw, but it is one reason people take teas, no?)

I know I personally don't want to be on more pills than I absolutely have to be, as someone who will be taking meds forever. So when I drink an herbal tea, call me crazy but I don't want it to poison me slowly through my guts.

Fucked-Up Tea Blends

A couple of weeks ago, I was at my friend's house and they offered me some tea. I am a lover of tea, as we've already established, so I was like "hell yeah, tea me up please!"

My friend is very smart and savvy, and they'd purchased some teas from an herb shop. I took a look on the back of the package to see if anything would interact with my meds or be inappropriate for the conditions I live with.

Tell me why almost all of them had root parts and dried berries mixed in with leaves and flowers? TELL ME WHY ALMOST ALL OF THEM HAD ROOT PARTS AND DRIED BERRIES MIXED IN WITH LEAVES AND FLOWERS???

That's like day one herbalism school shit!

Not seeing the problem?

Long story short, to make a medicinal tea out of the hard parts of plants you decoct them. To make a medicinal tea out of plant leaves and flowers, you can generally infuse them.

There are exceptions, but this is a hard and fast explanation of the problem.

Then there's the steeping time issue. I've seen teas advertised with 5-8 minutes of infusion, and no reminder to cover the tea.

It's not fair to you or the plants!

Wondering what to do now, as someone who loves tea? Well, first and of course, I invite you to Simple Herbal Teas for Sleep if you're in or around Kingston, NY this Thursday from 6:30-8.

We'll be getting into the nitty gritty of standard infusions, decoctions, ideal amount for particular herbs and your needs, and more.

If you can't make it out to the Hudson Valley though, here's what I'll say:

Buy Loose Leaf Tea

Get a tea pot, a cute one! Buy one of those tea balls that's annoying as fuck to clean! Throw it in french press, but clean it so you aren't drinking tea-coffee, unless you're into that.

Loose leaf tea is less likely to be full of microplastics. (Though these days we shouldn't kid ourselves that anything is totally microplastic free.)

Check the Bag

Many flowers and leaves: cool! You can generally make an infusion and move on with your delicious beverage. Roots, seeds, some hard stems or dried berries? Decoct it and drink.

Leaves, seeds, and berries. Leave it on the shelf as a general rule. There are some exceptions, as I said, but by an large it's gunna be a problem.

Buy from Herbalists Whose Training You Know

I'm not gunna say anything else or I'll sound shady. All I'll say is people should list their training and teachers. It matters, folks.

Wanna know why it matters?

Because folks are quick to say stuff doesn't work when they're not engaging with plants effectively. It's not all about having a million followers.

To me, rootwork is spirit and science. There's a way to do things and it must be taught.

When the right processes aren't used, it erodes faith in our traditional healing practices. This sucks because in many cases, if the appropriate methods were followed the outcome may have been completely different.

Best to get off on the right foot.

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Hey, I’m Cyrée

I’m a rootworker, diviner, and clinical herbalist. I believe that spirit work is an essential part of all movements for justice. I hope you’ll take a look around, there are plenty of opportunities here to deepen your connection with your gifts (with my guidance.)

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